Real self UK

How to Embrace Your True Identity: Authentic Living

Be authentic to yourself

Have you ever taken a moment to envision the best version of yourself? It's something I've pondered extensively. If you're here reading this, it's likely because, like me, you're on a journey of growth and self-improvement. 

While our current reality may seem  satisfactory, there's always room for refinement and maintenance. We yearn for change in certain aspects, knowing it will enhance our overall experiences. It dawns on us that our relationships and emotional well-being could benefit from a little extra attention. 

Be yourself as everyone else is taken

In my own life, I've long been a devotee of personal development, continuously seeking to better myself. I must admit, I've been quite demanding of myself for a considerable stretch of time, aspiring towards what I now understand to be an unattainable ideal. One significant misstep was the tendency to compare myself to others. Whether it was a colleague I was collaborating with or an idealised figure from the pages of a self-development book, I often fell into this trap.

It wasn't until recent years that a revelation slowly unfolded within me. I came to the profound realisation that there was absolutely nothing amiss with being true to myself. This realisation was further solidified and encouraged when I gained a clearer picture of my own behaviours (more about this towards the end of this article). These days, I proudly embrace my quirks, cherishing my distinct personality traits, albeit I am less of a people pleaser than I was, I have always preferred being true to myself and others – agreed it can be easier said than done. It sometimes feels we are leaving our selves vulnerable and in my case letting go of perfectionism. Believe me though the benefits outweigh the compromise.  Besides if being vulnerable equates to honesty, I'm in! 

Authentic Leadership

Is highly valued in today's world. Herminia Ibarra states in a Harvard Business Review article that authenticity is now seen as the standard for effective leadership. This is especially true during times of uncertainty and when moral values are being questioned. Goffee and Jones discovered that we need solid anchors of security to hold onto when boundaries are disappearing and changing. We desire leaders who we can trust, knowing that they will prioritise our interests and are willing to show their genuine selves, even if they have some weaknesses, to a certain extent.

To be authentic


What does being authentic mean?

There are numerous accounts and summaries out there. I like this straightforward version outlined  in by an article (Authentic how to be true to yourself) by Mind Tools: 

Being yourself quotes

“Put simply, authenticity means you're true to your own personality, values, and spirit, regardless of the pressure that you're under to act otherwise. You're honest with yourself and with others, and you take responsibility for your mistakes. Your values, ideals, and actions align. As a result, you come across as genuine, and you're willing to accept the consequences of being true to what you consider to be right”- MIndTools

What is self love?

Having a high regard for your own well-being and happiness is what self-love is all about. It means prioritising your own needs and not sacrificing your well-being just to please others.

Authentic self meaning

Authenticity is about being true to yourself, your values, needs, and boundaries. Finding and knowing who you are isn't easy, and maintaining a state of balance can be challenging.

We all have aspirations for success, a natural desire to accomplish meaningful things in life. The real contemplation lies in the approach we choose to adopt. You may already have your set goals, but have you ever reflected on the essential qualities that will lead you to your destination?

Commonly cited attributes like grit, integrity, confidence, and creativity often top the list. Yet, have you ever paused to appreciate the transformative power of authenticity in navigating the landscape of modern success?

True self

How to be your authentic self - Think about these things:

Streamlined Decision-making

Embracing authenticity entails staying genuine to oneself. In doing so, one also remains aligned with their aspirations. This authenticity serves as a compass, guiding every decision towards a reflection of personal values and the intended destination.

Shielding Yourself from Less Favourable Influences

When authenticity defines your approach, individuals who might not be as forthcoming or candid in their own journeys may naturally gravitate away. And even if they linger, your innate sincerity acts as a beacon, allowing you to discern those who may not share your level of authenticity.

A Magnet for Genuine Connections

Authenticity breeds trust, drawing people towards you. Whether seeking collaborators for a project or simply navigating social settings, you'll find yourself at the heart of interactions more frequently. This leads to forging deeper connections with those genuinely interested in supporting your journey towards success.

Be more authentic

Agile Learning

Being authentic means not squandering time on self-deception. When faced with challenges or uncertainty, you're inclined to seek practical solutions, resulting in more fruitful outcomes. This trait fosters a swifter learning curve, ultimately contributing to a more successful path forward.

Embracing Life without Regrets

How often has your intuition whispered that something wasn't quite right, or that a detour might be in order? Authentic individuals tend to lend a keen ear to these inner nudges. Trusting your instincts (that inner voice) is a valuable asset, for more often than not, they lead you in the right direction. Authenticity becomes a steadfast guide, steering you towards choices aligned with your true desires, rather than succumbing to societal expectations. By heeding your intuition, you'll likely find yourself with fewer regrets and a trove of accomplishments to boot!.

Upholding a Reputation of Integrity

One's reputation holds paramount significance on the path to success. When others perceive you as genuine, their support naturally follows suit. This, in turn, becomes a cornerstone for the attainment of success, built on a foundation of authenticity and trustworthiness. 

True self quotes

Top Benefits of Being Your Authentic Self

Embracing one's authentic self may seem like sound advice, I’m sure you agree? Yet, have you considered the myriad of advantages that come with staying true to who you are? Research indicates that authenticity transcends mere sentimentality; it exerts positive effects on your well-being, relationships, and even professional endeavors! Now, let's delve into some of the key merits that come with leading a life of authenticity.

Enhanced Self-Confidence

Living authentically holds a profound influence on your self-assurance. You come to appreciate yourself more, placing trust in your own discernment. You recognize and harness your distinct array of skills and talents, leading to choices that resonate with your true aspirations.

Cultivating Respect

With the blossoming of your confidence, you naturally evoke respect in others as they witness you embodying your genuine self. Everyone seeks someone to admire, and authenticity is something that people readily identify and hold in high regard. In this way, you may find yourself becoming a source of inspiration for those around you.

Fostering Trust

Observing you uphold your values and express yourself candidly, people's trust in you will flourish. Trustworthiness forms the bedrock of effective leadership. By establishing a reputation for honesty and dependability, you are more likely to be entrusted with opportunities for advancement or promotion. 

Enhanced Well-being

Aligning your life with authenticity naturally leads to a heightened sense of self-care. Prioritizing rest, balance, and nurturing oneself becomes second nature. Studies reveal that those dedicated to an authentic existence are more likely to adopt healthy dietary habits, engage in regular exercise, and seek routine medical check-ups. Furthermore, being true to yourself lays the foundation for improved mental well-being, fostering a state of tranquillity, reduced inner conflict, and overall contentment.

Heightened Resilience

Individuals in harmony with their true selves tend to exhibit remarkable resilience in navigating life's inevitable ebbs and flows. They adeptly manage stressors, yielding substantial benefits for their physical health. Unlike those ensnared in the relentless grip of chronic stress, they find solace in their authenticity.

Strengthened Relationships

Authenticity paves the way for deeper, more fulfilling relationships, for there is no pretence in who you are. You can express your true self and articulate your values without the weight of judgment. What's more, you become adept at setting boundaries and cultivate a spirit of acceptance towards your partners. 

Natural self

Ultimately, embracing an authentic existence ensures that when you reach the end of your journey, you'll do so without the weight of regrets. You've likely glimpsed those poignant lists of regrets harboured by those nearing the end of their days, and you've resolved not to become one of them. The choice to live authentically is a choice for happiness. It begins now, with the decision to be true to yourself. Embrace authenticity and embrace joy.

Being authentic

7 Benefits of Living by Your Own Rules

From our earliest years, we're conditioned to conform, to meet the expectations set before us. We grow into responsibilities and become averse to taking risks. Over time, this routine may begin to feel somewhat mundane, and even lead us to question our true identity.

Since you are reading this. Now, is an opportune moment to reclaim that control. It's time to chart a course guided by your own principles

1) Cultivating Self-Appreciation (like you better)

Maintaining a sense of self-respect becomes challenging when you consistently compromise your true essence. However, adhering to your belief system and acting in ways authentic to yourself fosters a genuine liking for who you've become.

2) Earning Genuine Affection (others will like you)

The transformation doesn't go unnoticed by others. When you shed the masks and open up to trust, people value the authenticity you bring. This candor also creates a safe space for them to share their vulnerabilities—a rarity. It's only natural that they'll hold you in higher regard for being true to yourself.

3) Resilience in Setbacks

In moments of failure, you shoulder the responsibility. Embracing the lessons offered by the experience, you forge ahead. Losing on your terms means the opinions of others hold little weight.

4) Nurturing Deeper Connections

How can one truly connect with someone who presents a facade? Constantly projecting a polished exterior keeps the real you at bay. Genuine, intimate relationships thrive on the bedrock of honesty, allowing for genuine growth and development. Intimacy blossoms when authenticity leads the way.

How to live your authentic self

5) Rediscovering Your Passion

Being constantly driven by others' desires can leave your work feeling unfulfilling. Setting your own goals and aspiring to achieve your dreams infuses life with a deeper sense of reward. True delight arises when you are genuinely enthusiastic about what you're pursuing. This is where passion truly resides.

6) Living Free of Regrets

Regrets can weigh heavily on the heart. When you reflect on your life, what would you prefer to see? Would you rather say, "I adhered to societal expectations" or proudly declare, "I pursued my dreams"?

7) Embracing an Optimistic Outlook

Anticipation for each day becomes effortless when you know you're dedicating yourself to endeavours that truly ignite your passion. In this space, you'll find happiness and a surplus of optimism for what lies ahead.

It's true, there will be instances where adhering to external rules is necessary, like obeying speed limits or respecting boundaries. Yet, in those moments where you hold the reins, you'll discover a heightened sense of contentment. Embrace your true self, chart your own course, and wholeheartedly seize the richness of life.

And only follow the rules when you have to.

My experience:

As an individual with introverted inclinations, I occasionally pondered whether my circle of friends measured up in numbers when compared to others'. However, I've come to appreciate that I am the curator of the meaningful connections in my life. This realisation has enriched both my personal and professional life.

Authentic Self

Being more authentic to yourself

6 Powerful tips related to being your authentic self.

In various social settings, it's not uncommon for individuals to put on a façade or adopt a persona that differs from their true selves. Yet, at the core, embracing authenticity remains crucial.

While seeking acceptance is a natural inclination, it's equally vital to not be overly consumed by the opinions of others. True acceptance stems from being valued for who you genuinely are. It's worth remembering that investing time in those who can't or won’t appreciate your true self is a fruitless endeavour – DON’T do it!

Benefits of Being Your Authentic Self

1) Authenticity Fosters Lasting Integrity

Living inauthentically inevitably leads to a stumbling point. It's not a question of if, but when, you get called out.. Have you ever observed that those who weave a web of falsehoods often find themselves revising their tales? This arises from the challenge of maintaining a consistent narrative. In essence, pretending to be someone you are not akin to perpetuating a lie.

2) Embrace Self-Discovery

Understanding oneself is paramount. While it may sound like an obvious assertion, many individuals remain unfamiliar with their own essence. Take the time to unearth those subtle facets of your existence that you may have overlooked or kept hidden. There's no need to mask your true character, for it is an integral part of who you are. Embrace it; you cannot alter it.

3) Emulate with Integrity

We all have figures we admire. Yet, aspiring to be someone else is a different matter altogether. While it's valuable to adopt certain admirable qualities, ensure you do not stray from your authentic self at the core. Strive to integrate those traits harmoniously with your own essence.

4) Uphold Your Values with Integrity

When you hold a belief dear, stand resolute. There may be occasions where compromise becomes necessary, but never waver if it means compromising your core values. These are choices that will shape your conscience. It's crucial to make decisions that allow you to rest easy at night.

5) Reject Negativity as Your Identity

Negativity is not a defining characteristic that you should embrace. It's not an inherent trait, but rather something learned. Remember, you were not born with a predisposition towards negativity. It's time to shed this learned behaviour and reacquaint yourself with your true nature.

Genuine self

6) Chronicle Your Journey

Maintaining a journal stands as one of the most potent tools for self-discovery. People often find it easier to be candid when putting pen to paper. A journal serves as a mirror to your inner world, allowing you to reflect on your authentic self and take meaningful action accordingly.

Disadvantages of surfacing your Authentic Self and how to overcome:

Judgment and Criticism

Cultivate Self-Confidence: Build inner confidence to withstand external judgment and criticism by focusing on self-acceptance and acknowledging the value of your authentic self. Challenge!


Create Supportive Networks: Surround yourself with people who appreciate and support your authentic self, fostering a sense of belonging and reducing vulnerability.

Social Expectations

Educate Others: Engage in open communication to help others understand your perspective and educate them about the importance of authenticity.


Negotiate Differences: Approach conflicts with a willingness to understand and negotiate, finding common ground without compromising your core values.

Professional Challenges

Find Authentic Environments: Seek or create environments, both personally and professionally, that encourage and celebrate authenticity.

How to be authentic

Being authentic to yourself

3 Actionable Steps towards Being Yourself 

tips for being authentic by MyTrainingShop

Q & A

questions and answers around being authentic

What does it mean to be authentic?

Being authentic means embracing and expressing your true self, without conforming to external expectations or societal pressures. It involves aligning your actions, beliefs, and values with who you genuinely are.

Why is it important to be authentic?

Being authentic fosters a deeper sense of self-awareness, self-acceptance, and inner peace. It leads to more genuine and fulfilling relationships, as well as a greater sense of purpose and fulfilment in life.

How can Everything DiSC® help?

Everything DiSC® profiling provides a valuable framework for self-recognition and acceptance of our authentic self. By categorizing behavioural tendencies into distinct profiles, it offers a clear reflection of our unique communication styles, strengths, and potential areas for growth. Know more facts about Everything DiSC® from John Wiley here.

How can one discover their authentic self?

Discovering your authentic self involves self-reflection, introspection, and an exploration of your values, passions, and interests. It also requires letting go of societal or external influences that may have shaped a false persona.

What are some challenges people face in embracing their authentic selves?

Some challenges include fear of judgment or rejection, pressure to conform to societal norms, and the discomfort of confronting and accepting aspects of oneself that may have been suppressed or ignored. 

Will I be disliked at work?

Nothing should change. Stay true to yourself. Avoid speaking negatively about others and make an effort to actively listen to those around you. Unfortunately, not many people truly take the time to listen. By actively listening to others and their stories, you will not only improve your likability, but also be seen as an interesting individual, even if you allow them to do most of the talking. Demonstrate empathy. SEE our article about active listening.

What are the benefits of living authentically?

Living authentically leads to greater self-confidence, stronger and more meaningful relationships, a sense of purpose and fulfilment, and a deeper connection to one's own values and passions. It also promotes overall well-being and mental health. 

Will I be liked by being authentic?

Its really down to you and your confidence. INC suggests that there are 39 traits that make us likable here are six:

  1. They actively listen.
  2. They make a great first impression.
  3. They're accountable for their mistakes.
  4. They do what they say they'll do.
  5. They treat everyone with respect.
  6. They ask questions instead of making assumptions..........

......See the rest here

Everything DiSC presents with a high level of accuracy

Everything DiSC® raises Self Awareness 

Insights from DiSC enables individuals to better understand and appreciate their natural inclinations, allowing for a more authentic expression of themselves. Moreover, by acknowledging and embracing these inherent traits, individuals can foster a greater sense of self-acceptance, leading to improved confidence and self-assurance.

DiSC circumflex with priorities

Ultimately, DiSC® profiling serves as a powerful tool for navigating personal and professional relationships with authenticity and a deeper understanding of oneself.

Professional development

Teachers, trainers, learning and development consultants business advisors -  this is the section for you.

Personal Development see more here

© Sian

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My Training Shop's Blogs author is Sian Phillips

Discover the Power of Everything DiSC® Profiling Today.

Sian has First-Hand Business Experience: A Journey Through Entrepreneurship, Leadership and Leaning and Development

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